The Trouble With Revenge
by FiJi-hopper
Summary: After a fiasco in the Great Hall, Hermione and Draco are assigned to train gifted youngsters on how to control their magic. Both totally inexperienced in the arts of babysitting, find out how a bunch of crazy kids can bring two stubborn rivals together.
1. The Misfortune

_Hello everyone! Its Fiji-Hopper and I am writing my second story. The first one was okay but definitely needed improvement a.k.a sucked. So I hope that this one will be better. **All questions and comments will be appreciated. REVIEW! I beg you!**_

Draco and Hermione glared at each other as they sat in front of the Headmaster's desk. He was looking sternly at the both of them, but a talented observer would notice a mischievous and amused twinkle in his eye.

"Mr. Malfoy and Miss Granger. I am taken aback at the behavior that was displayed in the Great Hall yesterday. I understand there are…. difficulties between the two of you, but as Prefects, 6th years, and Hogwart's students, I expected better of you."

Hermione looked at her feet in embarrassment. Draco just stared at the Professor through half-closed eyes, looking bored.

Dumbledore cleared his throat and continued, "You both now understand the necessity of controlling your magic and anger, correct?" Hermione looked annoyed but nodded her head reluctantly and Malfoy scowled and mumbled a 'yes.' "Good." said the now overly enthusiastic Headmaster, "I am sure you have heard of a certain group of wizards and witches called 'Infantiers', right Miss Granger?"

Hermione looked rather happy at the chance to answer a logical question. "Why of course Professor. They are young boys and girls who show extreme magic promise well still in the womb. They can 'accio' objects to their mothers' stomach even without wands. Once they are born, they have difficulty controlling their gift because they often use it without realizing it."

Dumbledore applauded with pride in his eyes. "Yes, yes Miss Granger. Ten points to Gryfindor." Malfoy rolled his eyes.

Hermione looked confused and a bit suspicious. "Professor, why do we need to know about Infantiers?"

The Headmaster's eyes again took on that mysterious gleam. Hermione and Draco discreetly pushed their chairs back a tad.

"Ah yes. Well this year, we are starting a program that reaches out to the Infantiers families. You see, their young children running around and ah, blowing up the neighbor's cat and other misfortunate events also affects the family. So it will be somewhat of a relief program. And the children will learn how to control their magic so no one will get hurt."

"That's all good and well, but what does this have to do with me and Granger?" Draco drawled, annoyance evident in his voice.

Dumbledore looked at the blonde-haired boy patiently, "Well, you see Mr. Malfoy, the staff has had full schedules and I have unexpectedly been laden with work from the Ministry. So you might be wondering who will have time to teach the little children."

Hermione and Draco glanced at each other, still not comprehending. "I myself was wondering the same thing until yesterday afternoon during lunch when two of my brightest students were suddenly throwing hexes at each other and standing on tables. Poor Mr. Longbottom never got to eat his pudding…"

"So then I thought to myself, 'Bumble..." Draco interrupted with an incredulous look.

"Sir, who the hell is Bumble?"

Dumbledore looked surprised and then continued, "That's my nickname for myself. Any who, I thought 'Bumble, what is a suitable chastisement for this pair of students and a way to end my Infantiers dilemma?' And then it came to me. I could teach you two to get along with each other while also teaching the children to control their magic!" Dumbledore looked expectantly at the pair of them, as though wanting a pat on the back or a high-five for his brilliance.

They both said, "How?"

"By having YOU teach them of course!"

"WHAT!" They turned to each other with looks that said, 'Has he gone bonkers?' and "How can I safely knock him out and hide his body without getting caught?' You can probably tell which one was Draco's.

Hermione sputtered, "But what about our homework? And our Prefect duties? How could we possibly have time to-?

"And I won't be caught dead spending my free time with Granger! I couldn't live with myself! I'd kill myself." Draco looked incensed at Hermione as she muttered a 'Please do.'

"Yes, I knew Miss Granger would be worried about her studies but let me assure you, I have looked into it. Not only will helping these children be somewhat of a review of past work, but also I made it so it's not everyday. You teach on Mondays, Wednesdays, Thursdays, and Saturdays."

Draco gritted his teeth, "That's not a lot of time at all."

Hermione opened her mouth to argue but was quickly cut off by Dumbledore. "This is a time to be focused on the needs of others. These children can seriously injure themselves and others if not properly guided. I trust that you, together, are capable of showing them the ropes."

She looked a little uneasy, "What if they don't listen to us Headmaster?"

Dumbledore just replied off-handedly, "I have met them already. They are quite charming youngsters and are eager to learn. I think there may be a prankster or two amongst them but I doubt there will be much trouble. If there is, I am sure you and Mr. Malfoy are quite capable of dealing with them."

"There are 18 in the group, aging from 4-7 years old. You may recognize some of them as the younger siblings of others in Hogwarts. Now, I believe the two of you have had enough to digest. Tomorrow, I will give you the times of the meetings and the first class. Go down to dinner before the house elves clear it up. I believe they are serving 'spotted dick.' Delicious."

Hermione and Draco hurriedly left as the Headmaster drifted off into his own thoughts with a smile on his face. They began the trek to the Great Hall in silence, thinking about the new task that lay ahead of them.

Draco was startled out of his thoughts of revenge by the realization that Hermione was glaring at him. "What the hell do you want?"

"This is all _**your** _fault you know? I was minding my own bus-

"**_MY FAULT! _**Do you have any bleedin' idea of what you're talking about, Mud blood?"

"I was getting to that. And for Merlin's sake quit calling me Mud blood, you pampered…poodle!"

"A pampered- what the hell?"

"You know the prissy purebred dogs who act all high and mighty cause their owners wipe their bottoms for them!"

"Whatever, Granger. Don't launch yourself into hysteria. Merlin knows I don't want you getting all rabid on me, spitting and shit."

"Malfoy, that's besides the point. The point is now we have to get all chummy with snotty little buggers cause you don't like to get your hands dirty. If you would just do your part of the damn potion, we wouldn't be in this mess."

"Why Granger? Don't you like children? I would have thought a saint like you would adore them right down to their tiny little toes. And why should Malfoys do work when there are Mud Bloods about, happy to accommodate their superiors? "

"For your information, I never really have had many…experiences with children and the few I've had have been very scarring. Especially for the child." Hermione shuddered. She chose to ignore his second comment, do to her rapidly rising blood pressure.

She continued, "What about you Malfoy? You don't exactly strike me as the 'Mr. Rogers' type."

Draco narrowed his eyes, "We have an understanding. They don't touch me and I don't touch them."

Hermione snorted. "Do you honestly think all these kids are going to obey that? Just imagine: their germ-ridden, snot- covered, sneezed- into hands tugging your arm and raking their hand through your precious hair..."

"STOP JUST, STOP! You've made your point, Woman!"

Hermione rolled her eyes. They were approaching the doors to the Great Hall. As Draco pushed them open, eruptions of noise surrounded them.

Draco put a hand out to stop her from entering. "We shouldn't go in at the same time. I don't wanna be seen with a Mud Blood."

She scowled and pushed past the outstretched arm. "Fine. You wait. I don't wanna be seen with a Malfoy."

The bushy-haired witch stalked across the room to the Gryfindor table, where Harry and Ron looked curious and a little afraid as their friend sat down heavily at the table.

Draco strutted over to the Slytherin side and looked at Crabbe and Goyle, too busy eating spotted dick to notice his arrival. 'Oh how I have so much to look forward to in life' Draco thought bitterly and poked at a piece of dick. Ewww.

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Hermione groaned as her alarm clock chimed loudly. _ARGH! _ On the best of days, Hermione was unpleasant in the mornings. On the worst…well, we shouldn't speak of it.

She pulled on a purple robe and trudged to the prefects' bathroom. It was with a sinking feeling in her stomach that she saw a certain blonde-haired Slytherin headed for the same bathroom.

Normal Hermione would have darted off in the opposite direction and let Malfoy use it first. Morning Hermione just didn't give a shit what he thought.

Draco stopped in his tracks as he became aware of an odd grunting noise in the direction he was going. A purpley, misshapen…thing with an Afro was walking straight at Draco. He decided this morning that he deserved a good bath before classes after the night he had.

**FLASHBACK**

"_CRABBE FOR THE- WHAT THE… GET THE FUCK OUTTA MY DORM!" _Draco had just stormed into his room after a particularly nasty dinner of spotted dick. The news of having to spend more time with Granger certainly did not improve his mood.

Crabbe had been lying naked on Draco's bed, wearing Draco's cologne, and rubbing his face with Draco's boxers, while listening to a Cher cd that was most certainly _not_ Draco's.

Crabbe sprung up, having been completely unaware of the object of his perverse affections being in the room with him. He rushed past Draco; too stupid to realize that he was not wearing anything other than the skin the good Lord gave him.

After seeing Crabbe naked, Draco decided he had to two options: kill himself or gouge his eyes out. He chose liquor.

FLASHBACK ENDS…THANK GOD 

They reached the entrance to the bathroom at about the same time. Draco was a little afraid to get any closer to the 'thing.' But, as they met at the door, he realized it was Granger. She was obviously no morning beauty. Draco snorted. She wasn't a beauty at any other time of the day either.

As Draco was thinking over these matters, Hermione decided to take the initiative and grabbed the doorknob.

This snapped the Slytherin to attention.

"Granger, although I understand that you _desperately _need a bath, have you not yet realized that nothing can rid you of that appalling stench?"

Hermione's head turned to his direction. She had a smile on her face that was eerily calm. "Well _Malfoy, _I know that everyone has a feminine side, but do you really want to exploit it anymore by parading about smelling like a sweet little daisy? Why don't you go take a shower, with all the other little boys? Don't pretend you don't enjoy it Pumpkin!"

Draco's face registered shock. No one spoke to him like that! Anger soon replaced the astonished look on his face and he growled. Hermione didn't even flinch. She proceeded to open the door and slam it in Draco's face, his mouth still open with the retort that he was going to throw at her.

He stuck his foot in the door just in time. Malfoy angrily shoved it open and the motion sent Hermione crashing to the floor.

"How dare you! You stupid, know-it-all-

"Taking insult lessons from Professor Snape? And I thought you had class. Actually, scratch that. I always knew that you had no original material."

Draco snarled and pulled Hermione up by her robe.

"Listen Granger-

"Don't think I will Poodle!" Then she slapped him across the face.

Her surprising force had knocked Malfoy's head to the side. The fuming young man looked back at her and she knew the line had been crossed. Like she gave a shit. He was being a bastard!

Hermione tried to pull away from Malfoy and he tried to pull her closer. That resulted in them slipping in a puddle on the floor and falling into the tub.

Unfortunately for Draco, he landed on his head.

Unfortunately for Hermione, he wasn't moving.

Now suitably awake, she chucked the nearest object in Draco's direction, or where she thought was Draco's direction because right now he was nowhere to be found.

"Malfoy you little- Malfoy? Where are you?"

Looking down, Hermione saw a dark object at the bottom of the pool. On reflex, she dove down and tugged him up to the surface, not a dreadfully easy task.

Panting, she looked at Draco's paler than usual face. A trickle of blood was trailing down his forehead to his eyes. She gasped as the trickle became thicker. He needed help.

Hesitantly, Hermione yanked Malfoy out of the tub, none to gently. She was still pissed at him, for well, pissing her off, but she couldn't help but feel worried for the Slytherin. Damn Gryfindor heroism.

She levitated him and dashed to the Hospital Wing, 'accidentally' knocking some of his limbs against doorframes and the wall. Well, she could act like a Slytherin if he could.

Madam Pomphrey hurried to Hermione's side as she levitated Draco to a bed.

"Oh my! What on earth happened!" Hermione bit her lip nervously.

"Err… Well, Madam, he hit his head on the side of the bathroom-

"The Slytherin dorm's bathroom?" Madam Pomphrey questioned with a surprised expression.

"No, the Prefects. Anyway, I was on my way down there for a bath of my own before classes start and- wait, what time is it?" Hermione frantically searched for the clock.

"Miss Granger, calm yourself. Here, I'll do it for you." She proceeded to force feed a potion to Hermione. "Please continue. I'm sure you will be excused from your classes for now."

"Oh okay well, I heard a shriek and luckily the door was unlocked and I found him passed out at the bottom of the pool." She said this part quickly, for she was always a poor liar.

Madam Pomphrey looked slightly doubtful at Hermione but thankfully, decided not to question her further. "Alright Miss Granger. You may go to classes now. I'm sure Mr. Malfoy will be appreciative when he finds out what you did for him," she paused as Hermione snorted and then hastily turned it into a coughing fit, "and I shall keep you informed on his condition."

"Oh no, that won't be necessary." Hermione said with conviction.

"Alriiight. Then are you sure you are feeling okay-

"I feel top notch thank you and now I will be off. Chow!" Hermione ran out of there, praying fervently that Draco would come down with amnesia because if he didn't, her ass was grass…so to speak.


	2. The Confrontation

The next morning Draco woke up with a throbbing headache. _Whoa, must have been at one heck of a party last night. My head feels like shit. Hmm… I wonder if I brought anyone back. _Draco opened his eyes; the room was definitely way too bright. _Where am I?_ He looked to his right and saw Madam Pomphrey.

Wait…_MADAM POMPHREY! I BANGED MADAM POMPHREY!_ Draco's breathing started coming in short gasps.

"Mr. Malfoy, take deep breaths! What has gotten into you! You shouldn't be exerting yourself so much!"

Draco slowed his breathing to almost normal, but his heart was beating so fast, he thought it would burst through his chest.

"Listen Madam Pomphrey, I don't know what we did yesterday, but it was only a one time thing. There must have been liquor because I assure you I would never do something like…this if I were in my usual frame of mind. Now if its money you want…."

He slowly trailed off as he realized the nurse was looking at him with the oddest expression.

"Oh my. You must have hit your head harder than I thought. I have no idea what you are talking about. Perhaps you should lay down."

"What do you mean I hit my…oh. OH! GRANGER!" Recognition dawned in his features as he remembered the previous morning and what had transpired. He threw back the covers of the starched white bed and was about to go on a rampage when Madam Pomphrey grabbed his ear.

"OWW! Let go you bleedin' wench!"

Madam Pomphrey struggled not to bonk the insolent child on top of his insolent head. "Mr. Malfoy! What are you going on about? You obviously are not in your right mind. See, Miss Granger saved you. Don't you remember?"

Draco snarled ferociously, "Oh I remember alright. Where is that sniveling little Mudblo-

"Mr. Malfoy! Unless you want me to bind you to your bed, I suggest you contain yourself."

Draco shuddered as he recalled what he thought he and Madam Pomphrey had done last night. Her suggestion did not help take the image out of his mind.

He sat back on the bed reluctantly, and was immediately attacked by Madam Pomphrey, shoving liquids down his throat.

"What the- bloody hell." Then Draco knew no more. His last conscious thought was of getting back at Granger, someway or another.

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Hermione groaned inwardly for what felt like the thousandth time. History of Magic was so freaking boring. Yes, even know-it-all Granger was struggling to stay awake. Malfoy had been unconscious the whole night and she had overheard some Slytherins talking about how he had finally come to that morning.

_Wonderful. _She thought dejectedly. _Hopefully she gave him sedatives. Maybe the collision made him not right in the head…if he ever was right in the head. _Hermione snickered aloud at her wit. Curious heads turned in her direction and she just glared. _Mind your own business you nosy ass jockeys._

Suddenly a 5th year Hufflepuff walked into the room. Professor Binns didn't even notice and went on with his lecture. Hermione tuned in just in time to hear, "…goblins reproduction differed in the way they used various twigs to better the feeling of

euphoria …" _Eww. That's about enough of that. _

The Hufflepuff stopped waiting for the teacher's attention and said, "Hermione Granger, Madam Pomphrey would like to see you straight away."

_Here it comes._

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Draco was currently bored out of his mind. He had tried switching the potion dosage for a little 1st year that had broken an arm and that had only resulted in the kid going into a coma. _Well, that's no fun. _Draco thought disappointedly, as the young boys face went slack and he collapsed on the floor. He was hoping for something more along the lines of strange growths.

Madam Pomphrey had a fit, interrogating Draco on what had happened, at which he just shrugged and said, "He's a first year so why does it matter?" Apparently it did matter to Madam Pomphrey.

All the sudden the doors to the Infirmary banged open. A rather put-down looking Granger looked gloomily at him. Immediately his blood began to boil.

Madam Pomphrey merely said, rather distractedly, "Oh Miss Granger. There you are. Mr. Malfoy has been asking for you all day. I didn't know the two of you had become friends." At this Hermione laughed weakly. Continuing, the nurse declared, "I should tell the Headmaster about this. I'm sure he would be quite tickled."

_Yeah right. _Draco thought. _The senile bastard would have a heart attack._

In a secluded area at the opposite end of the infirmary, there came a rather piercing scream and Madam Pomphrey instantly left Hermione and Draco's side to attend to the child. Just the moment Draco had been waiting for.

"Oh Mud Blood," Here Draco spoke in a high voice, " I'd love to thank you for saving my life! You're so sweet and nice! Actually," Draco reverted back to his usual drawl,

" Thanks for knocking me on the head, practically drowning me in the tub, not leaving me there to die, and then lying to Madam Pomphrey to save your own neck. Thank you so very much." He finished sarcastically.

Hermione said meekly, " Note the 'not leaving you to die' bit."

Malfoy laughed bitterly. "I wish you had. My neck feels like a hippogriff went into labor on it."

"Interesting that you use the word hippogriff. Reference to the 'oh-so-life threatening' injury in third year." Hermione was now getting a little pissed that he wasn't giving her any credit.

Smirking he replied, " I was obviously trying to get the great oaf fired. Which he wasn't. And get a little sympathy. Which I did. From Pansy."

Hermione just grimaced. "Hey, it's not fair for you to act all bitchy when one; you started it. Two; you would have left _ME _to die. And three; my lying saved both our 'necks.' If they would have known you were going to hurtme, we both would have gotten into trouble."

"Don't flatter yourself Granger. I wasn't going to _hurt _you."

She huffed in annoyance, "Fine. Inflict bodily harm then."

Draco looked thoughtful, "Well, that may have been a possibility."

"Whatever. The point is that's the story and we're sticking to it."

"Since when do I do what you say? What makes you think I won't turn the story completely around and make it seem like your completely to blame. Which you are." He added as an afterthought.

"Since Dumbledore likes me better, you wouldn't want to seem like you were beaten up by a girl, and I could push my finger really into head and rupture your brain?" Hermione finished logically.

Draco did not look thrilled. "Alright fine. I'm not agreeing because I am in anyway saying you are correct with your assumptions but simply because my head hurts and your shrill voice is giving me a headache. But I get to make up how I got into the tub and became unconscious."

"Alright, its your head." Hermione tried very hard not to look to pleased with herself. She swept out of the Hospital Wing with a slight billowing in her robes, making her look very similar to Professor Snape.

Draco just muttered a 'blimey,' and chugged some Sleeping Potion. Tomorrow will be hellish.

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**Yes, I know it was totally short and I suck. I just wanted to take this opportunity to say thanks for your reviews. Feel free to leave some more. And then go under different names and leave a bit more. Hehe.**


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